A Place for All Women

We’ve Got a Friend

          One of the cutest girls I have ever seen was sitting across the table from me in the coffee shop.   Her blue eyes sparkled, as short blond curls bounced around in the sunlight beaming through a wall of windows.  We had just met and I was there to mentor her.  Funny, I still feel like I need someone to show me the way.  But, I guess I am one of those “older” women described in the New Testament book of Titus…shocking as it may sound to my entire system.          

          So… we have a couple of hours of wonderful conversation, hug each other, agree to meet again and off we go.  I head to the library, boot up my computer and promptly Google this sweet little girl’s name.  If I had known what was about to pop up when I was sitting across from her, it might have changed the entire meeting.  But, as it was, her kind, sweet, humble spirit made an impression before I ever saw a video of her being crowned a beauty queen!          

          We had just had one of those mother/daughter type talks about how “nothing is ever as it appears” and here I am watching her walk the runway with that incredible crown of jewels and the big bouquet of roses.  I was so impressed…not that she had won a competition of that magnitude… but that I had just spent two hours with her and had no idea.          

          Fast forward a few weeks and we meet again for a walk and talk.  We cover every subject from the puppy she’s trying to train, to when it might be a good idea for her to think about having a baby.  Right before we make it back to our cars, we touch on the topic of Facebook.          

          Now, there’s almost 25 years difference in our ages, yet we each confess to feeling the same way.  Sometimes, not all the time, but sometimes, after looking at all that is going on with the hundreds of Facebook friends, we feel a little down, a little discouraged, slightly depressed.  

          There are photos of big homes, new cars and exotic vacations.  Even though we both know better, we sometimes compare ourselves with all that we see.  It might make sense for a 51-year-old woman to do that, but a 20-something beauty queen?  Really?          

          What’s happening in her life is that she’s trying to live modestly in order to remain debt free.  When she sees high school and college friends buying big beautiful houses, accepting that next grand promotion or traveling to Hawaii… well, it makes her question where she is in her life.          

          I typically just covet the travel photos and waste away an entire afternoon living vicariously through whichever FB friend is off on a great adventure.          

          It’s not that we’re not happy for them; it just makes us question ourselves.  Come on, you know you do it too.  It might not be Facebook, but somewhere in your life you’re looking at someone else and thinking they’re bragging.  And, of course, they are.  If it were you, it would only be sharing.


          So, I started thinking.  If Facebook, or any other similar website, has the power to work against us…how can we come up higher and make it work for us?  These are just a few thoughts.

          NOTE TO SELF:

          -Boast only when boasting in the Lord

          -Never use “What’s on your mind” to be a pessimistic, negative, buzz kill.

          -Consider other people’s feelings when posting.  Not everyone reads with the same inflection.

And, just as I learned from the young woman I was supposed to be teaching…

          -Never cast any light in my own direction.

Light should only reflect off of us and on to the

One who is the

Giver of ALL Good Things!

          Since back in the Old Testament books of Genesis, when one brick was laid upon another to begin building the Tower of Babel, we have all wanted to be “somebody.”  And there is absolutely nothing wrong with fame, money or success, as long as we don’t lose sight of the Source.          

          Now, don’t get me wrong and think I’m getting all self-righteous and holier than thou, or climbing up on my goody two shoes soap box.  A quick scan of my Facebook Timeline would show more than a few “Hey Look At Me” postings.  And if you asked the former Miss America contestant, she would probably tell you I gave her an entire resume of my accomplishments the morning we met.  But I’m just wondering if I can start using Facebook for the good of others rather than feeling like it lures me into an enemy trap?

© Copyright 2012, KeziahCarrie.  All Rights Reserved

Comments on: "We’ve Got a Friend" (9)

  1. Amen! Thank you for the reminder that there is power in our words – power to hurt, to heal; power to lift up and tear down; power to praise and spread joy. Another wonderful job, Annette!

    • I always pause when I see this verse: “The tongue has the power of life and death,and those who love it will eat its fruit.” I need constant reminding that fruit can be both good and ROTTEN! LOL I know you’re busy so taking the time to comment means so much!!

  2. Hmmmm . . . I was in a rotten mood yesterday and my facebook posts probably did not shine His light much. I shoulda read this first. Good post, girl.

  3. This is so true about Facebook. I’ve spoken with several friends about this phenomena and they all admit to feeling a similar wave of discontent while scrolling through their newsfeed. I like your tips for combatting that feeling.

    • A psychologist I know calls it our “online persona” versus our “real self.” If we are only posting what we want people to see, so are they. There are also those who use it to get down in a pit and entice any number of followers to get down in there with them. Technology provides us with powerful tools, and I think it will show wisdom on all our parts, to keep them in check. 🙂

      • Absolutely! Well put. It reminds me of a quote I once read: “Try not to compare your behind-the-scenes to everyone else’s highlight reel.” I thought it summed it up nicely.

      • Absolutely! Well put. It reminds me of a quote I once read: “Try not to compare your behind-the-scenes to everyone else’s highlight reel.” I thought it summed it up nicely.

      • I love that!! I’m in a Bible study right now where we are studying the things we say to ourselves that we would NEVER say to someone else, like “You’re so fat” or you’re so ugly or flabby or stupid or whatever…any way we were asked to keep a close check on our own words as we went through the week. I was telling my dad today that as soon as I finished the Bible study my first thought was “Oh gosh you haven’t gotten anything done today.” I would never walk up to someone else after a Bible study and say that…in fact I would probably tell them that any time they spend with God will be rewarded. I’m clearly a work in progress!! 😀

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